one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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