She's JV to your varsity
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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