It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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