I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?