At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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