My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
