Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I have fence marks all over my body
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
