Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
