You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You are a booty call, not a friend.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
