Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
