And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
