it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
