i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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