At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
