How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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