return my video game
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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