you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
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You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
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I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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