I must be too annoying 4 u.
My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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