I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
that's an acceptable place to lick
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.