erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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