There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
