"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
