you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
