When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
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party gras won. party gras always wins.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
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There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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