I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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