I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
