They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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