I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize