I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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