Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
