Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
