Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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