gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
