so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
