You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
