They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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