i can't believe i had my finger in that
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize