he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
