Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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