she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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