so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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