I can't watch pbs sober anymore
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize