I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize