If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
