would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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