I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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