Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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