Texts From Last Night

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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...

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  (704): Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom... http://tfl.nu/jmqs
  Replies (8) Good night (670) Bad night (1317)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  im so drunk with asians

  (1-614): View more from Ohio

  where?

  (614): View more from Ohio

  always

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  (614): im so drunk with asians (1-614): where? (614): always http://tfl.nu/is91
  Replies (43) Good night (7395) Bad night (705)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine

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  (703): She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine http://tfl.nu/jb79
  Replies (41) Good night (719) Bad night (5293)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it

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  (312): i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it http://tfl.nu/tzqh
  Replies (92) Good night (7359) Bad night (1949)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot

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  (814): all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot http://tfl.nu/2zr0
  Replies (51) Good night (7635) Bad night (884)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis

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  (404): Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis http://tfl.nu/8wlo
  Replies (8) Good night (4159) Bad night (666)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta

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  (337): Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta http://tfl.nu/2wvh
  Replies (21) Good night (4451) Bad night (1124)
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  (806): View more from Texas

  I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.

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  (806): I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you. http://tfl.nu/8w6h
  Replies (12) Good night (3278) Bad night (850)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"

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  (513): I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem" http://tfl.nu/bkek
  Replies (4) Good night (1930) Bad night (732)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?

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  (316): What's life without a lamp shade you wore home? http://tfl.nu/4piv
  Replies (6) Good night (1177) Bad night (601)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters

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  (401): Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters http://tfl.nu/a1rx
  Replies (2) Good night (477) Bad night (967)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.

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  (914): Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon. http://tfl.nu/php8
  Replies (11) Good night (1883) Bad night (390)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.

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  (202): I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone. http://tfl.nu/ocz4
  Replies (17) Good night (871) Bad night (1056)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen

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  (412): with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen http://tfl.nu/zqf6
  Replies (6) Good night (853) Bad night (405)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.

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  (734): Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink. http://tfl.nu/pqtj
  Replies (1) Good night (237) Bad night (667)

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