he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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