i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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