Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
